Insecurities

Most of you who "know" me, or read my blogs, probably believe that insecurity is not likely one of my character flaws. (Arrogance, on the other hand..)

And most of the time, you'd be correct. I am not insecure in my self, or my knowledge, or where I stand. I am firm in my beliefs, in my wisdom, in my own body.

But you'll be interested to know that even I struggle with insecurity on some level.

For me, it's the concept of change. I don't like it. I even fear it.

When change enters my life, it throws things out of whack. And so I abhor it.

You see, I operate on a rhythm, a schedule, a routine. I like things done a certain way, a certain order, each and every day. So when a change comes through or is being considered, things are not "my" way, and it can be difficult.

Yes, it sounds a bit spoiled, but routine is what grounds me to life. We are all different, and while this is a flaw in my build, I feel no shame for it, as you should not either.

So how do I deal with change? The same way I deal with everything. I take time to think about it. I weight the pros and cons of an upcoming change. I work through the details in my head until I am satisfied. And then I accept it. Of course, this works best with planned change. Unexpected change is far more difficult. In those cases I am working through it on the fly, improvising as I go along, until things settle back down and my routine rebuilds itself.

So that is my insecurity and how it is dealt with. Just about anything you are afraid or insecure about can be handled in a similar fashion. Take a step back and take control away from it. When you let fear or insecurity control your life, you are giving the reins over to irrationality and closing your eyes to what may come.

What are you insecure about? How do you deal with it now? Can you deal with it better?